Expectations

Expectations are premeditated resentments.

Instead say it this way....

Who is going to change your life?

Self acceptance

Where to begin....

It's been so long since I've taken a review at where my life is, it's going to be a little difficult to choose what's important to include and what's not. I first I feel it's important to introduce to you the new man in my life, Nate. I met him at a meeting. He is fantastic. we are taking things very slowly with no expectations. He is a major support for me right now. He is very loving, kind, smart, patient with my crazy acts of irrationality, and he has a very strong recovery.


My recovery has been struggling a little, I had almost eight months, then I slipped up on sleeping pills and cutting myself causing me to start over with a new clean date of 1/11/16. I have just over a month and a half now.


I've been extremely stressed lately due to some physical problems that have arisen. I was having tingling and painful, very painful numbness in my legs and arms that my regular doctor couldn't explain, so he sent me to a neurologist to get tested for MS. I'm going to end this blog here, because the story of what happened at that doctor appointment and that day, I think, deserves it's own entry.

I have a past...

Wonder

Sometimes I wonder if my daughter would love me, want to hug me more if I was more beautiful and skinnier like her step mom, so she wasn't so embarrassed of me and my physical appearance on top of my crazy behavior.